New Secretary

They’ve been ignoring me!  My secretary went on strike or found more lucrative employment, Mr B doesn’t type fast enough despite my attempts to show him how, and F doesn’t use the computer at home.  She says she has ‘enough of that at work thank you very much’. 

So what is a cat supposed to do?

I caught F using the computer in the hallway just before Christmas (Mr B was away again so maybe she had to use it) so I pleaded with her.  She just yelled ‘Ow’ and ‘don’t stick your claws in my leg’!  What’s wrong with her?  Can’t she see?   I was almost begging!  It is so demeaning, so undignified.

We have settled our differences however and she has agreed that now that her charity craft sale project is over and the Christmas catering blitz is behind us, she will take dictation until I can employ a new secretary.

Christmas:  I know it’s Christmas; that tree thing with baubles and lights comes out, and some decorations get hung along the hall just out of my reach.  There was a lot of activity in the kitchen late every night for a couple of weeks before the night when loads of people turned up and ate heaps.  F was coming home from London every night because Mr B was away, but she banged about making things she called ‘gingerbread’, and icing cakes, and making up boxes with food wrapped up like Christmas (baubles and sparkles)….  Cards appeared on the bookshelves.

No sleeping on the sofa then?

She did start putting turkey mince in my bowl though and that’s infinitely better than those gravy pouch things (which by the by, I’ve been refusing to eat because they’re boring and give me indigestion) – so she has her useful points even if she doesn’t do comfortable on the sofa.