Backyard Chronicles II

Dear Meredith

Mr B got a couple of those trap camera things for his recent birthday. I guess you have seen one sitting on the back lawn. We've been having a bit of a rodent problem and wanted to know if Roland has been raiding your diner too. (The camera isn't pointed at your private residence by the way.) We have personally observed your evening passage from your rural retreat at the top of the garden to the diner behind the garage.

It has, however, come to our attention that you appear to be running a sly-grogging joint out of the diner. There is a steady stream of your clients coming under the side gate and making a straight line for your speakeasy. Exactly how many of the local hedgehog community know about this place? (Is there any profit for us in selling tickets at the gate?)

For info, the open cage on the back concrete, and the peanut butter in it, are a 'honey trap' for Roland Rat.  If you need a supply of bar snacks for your establishment's menu it can be arranged, but we would be grateful if you could advise your clientele to refrain from eating the peanut butter - it isn't at all good for them.

I hope you are enjoying the new thatch on your country residence at the top of the garden, and that the relandscaping appeals to your aesthetic. We have noticed  you keep a clear distinction between your rural estate and your somewhat more cosmopolitan business location. (Does the taxman know anything about the amounts that have been lavished on the redesign of your extensive private garden?)

We would be very grateful if you would keep an eye open for that baby fox and tell him/her that the hoomans have opened the fox-door in the side fence and there will be food under the trailer if he/she wants to join the menagerie that dine here abouts.

The Hoomans👴🧓

PS - we have put the peanut butter out of reach of your customers. We recommend the dried insects option for your bar snacks menu.

PPS - that baby fox....has now been recorded on video squeezing out of your speakeasy in the wee small hours. Your bouncer? Barman? Bass player? We hope you have been keeping the noise levels down; we have neighbours you know.
For info of the blog readers - that hole in the diner is the size of a CD.  Right next door is a 'watering hole' that crow uses to wash food.


  1. Gosh I hope ‘Meredith ’ doesn’t encounter ‘Young Foxy’ on a dark night. We don’t know what might transpire.

    1. Seems that hedgehogs and baby fox are all on good terms (apart from competition for food). We have decided the best course of action is to fatten baby fox until he doesn't fit through the hole into the hedgehog diner. How long do you suppose that is going to take?

  2. As soon as I stop laughing out loud I will start talking to type which is what I'm doing today to save my mouth shoulder from hurting. This is one of the most wonderful stories that I have read and I would love to see the speakeasy and all the critters that come and enjoy themselves there. We have the same problem here I like to put out fruit for the birds because they love it but so do other critters and I do wish I had a cam out there to see what exactly goes on in our back and front yard during the night hours. They all love banana peels all of them. Than birds and squirrels. Want to try a banana peel in the speakeasy ha ha love love love the post today

    1. We tried pineapple cores - that was too exotic for their tastes. We will give banana skin a go. (We have noticed that Roland likes banana skin and had been trying to restrict his options.)

  3. Hari OM
    Oh, this post escaped me... glad I checked back. Good to see that Meredith is thriving (at least I guess so from the tone of your letter), and what fun to have film evidence of Baby Fox making itself at home! What an absolute cutie. I send lots of loving vibes for physical success of all who visit H&H Aire B&B!!! YAM xx


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